???

From Syrian friend

2008-06-05T00:00:00.005+02:00

I received an e-mail. I was so happy. I never thought I could visit Syria again soon. But I´ll fly to Turkey in July and pass Turkey, Syria and I´ll go to Lebanon. I wanted to meet this Syrian family again, so I sent a friend an e-mail.

In Syria, I visited a small village Srouz to see old beehive houses. Before I went to there I read some information. Pre-visitors gave travelers some advice.
"Many family will invite you and serve food or some tea, and then they will ask money about that food.”

As pre-visitors told us, as soon as I arrived there, many children came to me and then “come to my house, come to my house.” I was afraid of that situation. “no, no, no.”

While I looked around village, I met one girl who looked 14, 15 years old. She also invited me but I refused resolutely. After seeing beehive houses, I walked to come back. Following opposite side road, the girl who I met before was walking. “Where are you going?” I asked her, “To my home, my house is over there.” One house was really there. She asked once more “Come to my house.” I turned down again.

When I passed her house, her younger bother and older brother were there. The older brother gave me a fig and then told me “come, come!” and she also asked once more “Please, just a second.” I couldn’t refuse any more, so I went to their house.

She has a big family. There are Parent, 2 older sisters, 2 older bothers, 2 younger sisters, 2 younger bothers. Her mother served tea many times for me, and offered lunch. It was very delicious and I ate a lot.

Until I finished the lunch, I was still worring. ‘If they ask me to pay for this food, what can I do?’ But! they didn’t ask anything. Instead, the girl gave me some present, a pencil and a hair pin. I regretted having a doubt about their hospitality. I felt guilty.

Anyway, I had great time with that family for half a day. They asked me to sleep one night in their house. I wanted to stay with them but at that time I was a little bit sick and wanted to move to another city.

I´ve been keeping in touch with her brother. Her brother is a university student in Damascus and his major is Education. He liked children very much and he wanted to be a teacher in this small village. I was surprised. He didn´t pursue big success, just wanted to stay with his family and teach children in his hometown. So nice man...
He is the only man who I like among men who I met in the Middle East.

Whenever he reply to me he always say to me.
"Come to Syria”, “We miss you”, “Stay with us”

This time, he told me...

"Please take your family to my home."
"Oh. How much I miss you, we are waiting for you, All family..."

2008-06-04T01:20:00.001+02:00

° I´m made of non-me elements. The Buddha is made of non-Buddha elements. Nothing can exist by itself alone. Everything has to inter-be with everything else in the cosmos.

° You become nothing in order to become everything.

° We are just a stream called “life.”

-Thich Nhat Hanh(1997), "Teachings on Love"

Police violence

2008-06-02T00:49:00.002+02:00

What is happening now in South Korea?
Many friends of mine must have been there...
What should I do?
Should I meditate now following Thich Nhat Hanh´s teaching? ridiculous....

2008-06-01T18:41:00.002+02:00

Happy April...
Gloomy May...

moody, melancholy,depressed, lonely, sad, angry,...

Now, South Korea

2008-05-31T23:32:00.003+02:00

The stupid president!
What am I doing now and here???

baby sitter

2008-05-28T22:26:00.001+02:00

for two hours

Finding Refuge

2008-05-25T23:14:00.001+02:00

God does not exist outside of us. The ultimate, our refuge, is not outside us, it is right here inside us. " I rest in God" means "I take refuge in the ultimate." We can call the ultimate Buddhahood, God, or Allah, it is all the same thing.

THICH NHAT HANH(2004), ´Peace begins here´

Buddha recited it.

2008-05-23T21:08:00.003+02:00

Do not pursue the past.
Do not lose yourself in the future.
The past no longer is.
The future has not yet come.
Looking deeply at life as it is
in the very here and now.
The practitioner dwells
in stability and freedom.
We must be diligent today.
To wait until tomorrow is too late.
How can we bargain with it?
The sage calls a person who knows
how to dwell in mindfulness
night and day
"one who knows
the better way to live alone."

THICH NHAT HANH(1990),`Our appointment with life-The Buddaha´s teaching on living in the present´

Berlin trip

2008-05-23T21:01:00.001+02:00

image from: www.courses.psu.edu/nuc_e/nuc_e405_g9c/berlin/denkmaeler/neuewache.html

The principle of Nonduality

2008-05-22T20:57:00.004+02:00

There is nothing to throw away. If a person has never suffered, he or she will never be able to know happiness......... Thus pain and suffering are a necessary condition of our understanding of our happiness. So do not say that you do not want to know anything about pain or about suffering, that you only want to know about happiness-that would be an impossible thing. We know well that suffering helps us to understand, that it nurtures our compassion, and that for this reason it is vitally necessary for us. So we must know how to learn from suffering, we must know how to make use of it to gather the energy of compassion, of love, of understanding.

-THICH NHAT HANH(2004), ´True Love´

Episodes in ZEGG

2008-05-21T22:21:00.003+02:00

Mission: Save fishes!

There was a big place called Campus. We cleaned this big circle Campus for the community festival. In the middle of the Campus, there was a small fountain. We were given a task! Throw water inside the fountain with a bucket. I didn´t know why I had to do this job. Almost 10 people carried water buckets in turn for over two hours. When I could see the bottom of the fountain, I found the purpose of this job. There were a few fishes inside fountain(finally we found two small fishes). We cleaned the Campus with soap and washed with water, then the dirty and chemical water went down to the fountain. So they wanted to save fishes! I was very impressed. For two small fishes, 10 people worked for more two hours. How beautiful it is!

Nude sauna

We started working from 8:30am and had a break time 11am. We took a rest near community pool. For the break time, people took off their clothes and swam in the nude. It was so natural, I didn´t feel any sexual feeling. They sat or lay down in the nude and enjoyed sun, took a rest. I felt freedom. I wanted to join the naked swimming, I couldn´t. I was shy, didn´t have courage.

There was a sauna in community. After working, volunteer group went to sauna. I wanted to meet other community people, so I didn´t want to go there. But, every members of the community were very busy to prepare for their festival, I couldn´t ask interview. Then one of our coordinators suggested me to talk in sauna. So I went to sauna. After I entered the sauna, I was embarassed. Men and women shared a bathhouse and a dressing room. But I couldn´t go back, I wanted to interview her. Fortunately(?) I was late, so most people were already inside the sauna, only one American guy was with me. Oh my godness! I did take shower with him before I went to saunar! I was sooo shy....-.- I did quickly and then wore a towel around my body. In sauna, nobody used a towel except me. Everbody were naked and so natural.. so I looked funny.

I was surprised that the nude were so natural and made me have a feeling of freedom. And I realized that I wasn´t free about body and sexuality. I want to be free,,,, I´ll try to open... slowly... step by step..

ZEGG again

2008-05-20T23:08:00.005+02:00

I went to ZEGG again. There was the action week. Our mission was putting up tents!!! We put up many tents for summer camp. I met many volunteers from England, America, Austria, Germany, Czeck republick. We worked 7-8 hours per day and it was mostly hard work. and after working I had to prepare interview and meet community people. So I was exhausted. But!! I enjoyed staying in ZEGG.

A Korean Woman

I met a 56-year-old Korean woman in ZEGG. She is an immigrant and she worked as a nurse in Germany before like my aunt. She took a course of this community. People can stay for 4 months and experience community life. She was soooo kind to me, we ate together, talked in Korean and laughed a lot. She invited me to her room and massaged me with three big vessels. When she beat a vessel with a stick, it made beautiful sound and I could feel vibration on my back, legs. Then I did massage her. She showed me her old pictures. She was young and so beautiful...

Her daughter died 9 years ago, after that she made a decision to change her life. She always sacrificed herself for family and others. Now, she´s trying to enjoy her own life. I wanted to listen to her life story but she was weak and three days later she was sent to a hospital. That day when she left ZEGG, I gave her my letter. She also gave me a letter with some money. I was thankful to her...

An Austrian man
When I saw him at first, he looked very cold. He didn´t greet me, didn´t smile. There was a dance party. I wanted to dance but I couldn´t. I was too shy to dance in front of many people. I knew people didn´t care about me at all, but I couldn´t Next day, he asked me why I didn´t dance. "I was too shy, I want to change this attitude.." He told me, "Respect your feeling. Your feeling is also important. Respect your shyness. And if you want to change it, slowly, step by step..." I took comfort from him. After that we often talked together.

He was 47 years old. He works as a manager of an art theater(No hollywood movie). So he can see many good movies for free. He had three daughters. But he was divorced and they live in Ecuador with their mother. He works and sends money for them. He visits Ecuador once a year to meet his daughters. For him, daughters are very important. I felt his love, he is a good father. He was a most close friend among volunteers and he invited me to his home in Austria. Unfortunately, I don`t have a plan to visit Austria. But who knows!

Hitchhiking

2008-05-18T23:16:00.002+02:00

The short trip to Holland

2008-05-18T23:11:00.003+02:00

Shisi-cooked by Dutch man

Drinking beer

Lovely Dutch community-Vlierhof

2008-05-18T23:01:00.006+02:00

The green house

The happiest moment

The(almost)full moon party

The one year celebration

2008-05-18T22:34:00.004+02:00

I had the one year celebration yesterday. On the 17th May last year, I left South Korea. For the last week, my emotion was so complicated, I had been feeling a little bit down. I wanted to buy a cake but I couldn´t find a bakery. Yesterday, I reminded my traveling for one year.

For the last year, I visited Turkey, Iran, Syria, Lebanon, Jordan, Egypt, Denmark, The Netherlands, Germany. My favorite countries are Iran and Holland. The funny thing is the fact that I never planed to travel to both countries. During the trip, I changed my plan to visit these country. Unexpectation tends to make people have more fun. Also I met good friends there. And I visited six communities until now. I met a lot of people and I had a lot of memories with them.

The difficulty
Most time I enjoyed traveling but most diffucult thing was about men!!!
Many many sexual harassments occurred in the Middle East. I don´t want to remember. There were some very very dangerous moments as well. But I survived! I like traveling alone. Because I can meet more people. But as a woman, traveling alone is sometimes tough. Many men annoyed women travelers. It´s so sad…Western men aren´t different, I think. I don´t like men…-.-

The most toughest moment
The most toughest moment was when I was sexually harassed by Egyptian policeman. I asked him how to get to a bus station. He guided me and took me an underpass and harassed me. I screamed there, only three people passed and didn´t help me. I cried a lot. It was the first time when I cried after starting traveling. Not only sexual harassement but also my physical condition, I was exhausted. At that time I was very sick, I couldn´t eat anyting, I lost 2 kg.

Change
Physically
I´ve gained almost 10kg. My legs are getting thicker and thicker, my hands are getting rougher and rougher and got a lot of calluses on my feet and hands. But I like my legs and hands. Even though the shapes are not so good, those have a lot of stories.…

Also I gained freckles on my face because of the stong sun of the middle east. And my skin is getting darker and darker(Orginally, my skin is darker than normal Korean women). My hair is getting longer.

Mentally
I´m happy.
I can feel how much I love my friends and Mom.
I have more interest in Asian philosophy, values, culture.
I have many idea about what to do after going back to Korea.(not for surviving, just for fun)
I know how to live a littel bit. Take care of others, litsten to my heart, feel more, enjoy every moment. And I realized what I like, I like singing, dancing, litstening to other’s story. I´m good at empathy.
I like me more than before. Just as I am...I don´t compare me to other people any more.
I´m full of love.
Doo.. You did good job!!:)

I have a plan to travel for 8 month more. I hope I can finish my research about communities well and travel to the middle east safely again(less sexual harassement), love people more. I´m looking forward to meet more good friends and to have more new, exciting experience.

Let´s restart!

The warmest candle and coffee in my life

2008-04-07T22:41:00.007+02:00

I came to Kleve on Saturday. Yes! One more in a train station! But I always stayed at a big airport or a big train station. Kleve is a small town. My aunt and uncle never heard this name. In the train station, there were many teenagers drinking beer and smoking. It seemed to be a little bit dangerous to stay there. I was afraid something would happed to me. I imagined robbery and I thougt what I could do. I decided not to stay there and I found a pub. Music was loud and there were many people. I couldn't enter with big luggages, and people didn't look good. Old men and women were totally drunken and screamed. So I was standing in front of a building entrance next to the pub. But it wasn't comfortable. Too many people passed and looked me. There was a light entrance of a building Opposite the pub. It was small apartment. In front of the entrance, I sat and tried to sleep. But I couldn't. It was cold and I didn't feel safety.

Around 1 a.m. a man came to the entrance. I said to him "I'm sorry, I'm waiting the first train(4:30)." I didn't wait any train. But I thought residents didn't like me to stay in front of their apartment. So it meant "I'll leave soon, Don't worry". A few minutes later he came back and told me I could stay upstairs if I wanted. I was soooo lucky. I'm fortunate to meet people. He stayed with his friend. They invited me to their house but I didn't enter, stayed at stairs in front of their door. It was much warmer than outside and also felt safety. They gave me a candle and a cup of coffee. Those made me warm. Also I ate some fruit. Whenever they served something, they knocked from inside. :) They were sooo kind and they were preparing to travel to caribbean ireland. They left home 3 a.m. before I moved to the community. I was thankful to them. I was so worried before how to stay at night.

My second community in Germany is Vlierhof. Vlierhof is in Keeken, 2Km from the border between the Netherlands and Germany. It is twenty kilometres from the Dutch university town Nijmegen in the Netherlands. To come to this community, I had to take a bus from Kleve. During weekdays, bus runs only 7 times, moreover I had to call a bus with telephon 3~4 among 7. On Sunday, there was NO BUS!! I called this community but nobody answered. I was too tired and I didn't know what to do. I was angry... Two hours later, when I came out from payphone box, an old men approached me. "Do you need help?" "YES!! I should go to Keeken, but there is no bus." This old man and his relative picked me up to the community. The old man lives in Kleve but he asked people how to get to this community. I'm very lucky!!! Two times in succession!! On the way to Keeken he showed and explained a beautiful garden, a marriage church, a windmill and Rhein river. He told me he hitchhiked many times before.

I didn't know even his name, I forgot to ask. Who told me German were strict and serious in a negative way? I like Kleve people.:) Thank you!

And also I like Kleve, so beautiful and peaceful...

From Frankfurt to Kleve

2008-04-07T21:37:00.005+02:00

I visited my aunt, who lives in Rüsselsheim near Frankfurt. She is my father's sister and came to Germany to work as a nurse in 1973. Many Korean mineworkers and nurses went to Germany from the 1960's to the 1970's. My aunt and uncle has lived in a small apartment for 30 years. They are so plain. I could see how an immigrant's life was. I could find many immigrants from other countries, especially Turkey in this apartment and this town.

In fact, I met her once in my life when I was 11 years old. Before I met her, I couldn't remember her face. Korean tend to think family is special. Even though we haven't had any relationship for a long time, in the name of family I was given hospitable treatment. I could eat Korean food most meals except in the morning. I ate a lot of Kimchi. And they helped me to buy a new recorder, finally I bought a new one!!

I saw opera "Don Pasquale" with my aunt in the Rüsselsheim theater. It was comic opera, so fortunately I couldn't sleep. Actually it was very nice and I enjoyed it. The man who acted as "Don Pasquale" was very very good and Asian woman(may be Korean or Japanese) acted as "Norida". But at that time, there wasn't any immigrant except my aunt and me. Everbody was White people. I guessed immigrants and western people lived in a different space.

I stayed there for 3 days. I could stay more but I didn't want to. I was supposed to come to next community on Sunday. However I left them on Saturday. My plan was staying at Frankfurt airport.:) But! Unfortunately they bought a ticket for me on Saturday. I had to go to Kleve on Saturday.

From Berlin, I passed through famous german cities. Leipzig, Frankfurt, Köln, Düsseldorf, just passed through.... But from Frankfurt to Düsseldorf, the train ran along the Rein river. It was very nice. I could see some castles on the mountain and many houses by a river.

Free love

2008-03-30T22:05:00.001+02:00

I turned 30 years old today in terms of Korean age. But I'm still 29 years old in terms of an international age!

It was an absoulte spring day in the afternoon. I interviewed 58 year old man sitting on a bench outside. He is very attractive. And there was a disco party in this community yesterday. I saw one old man, who is a painter, dancing with a young woman. It looked very nice. I liked to see the scene. He was also soooo attractive. Why are old men so attractive even though they don't have much money? Usually men in a community are poor. Do young men think old women are attractive?

Anyway, this community-ZEGG(Zentrum für Experimentelle Gesellschafts Gestaltung)- is a 'free love' community. The meaning is more deeper than we think. It's about trust, communication, no violence, freedom... I like this idea. I think I can share a lover with other women. I can love without possession. In Korea, I told a boy friend like this. He was angry at me, he thought I didn't love him. But I did.. I just thought I could love more people at the same time. Whenever I told some friends about this kind of thought, I was regarded as a crazy woman.

'Free love', it doesn't mean people should have many partner. It's a big misunderstanding. Of course, removing a boundary of love and sexuality is important. But the real meaning is not about the number of partner. If I can follow my own feeling with freedom, if there are no fear, limitation, if I can do what I want to do, I can love freely with one partner.

This community is very interesting and unique.

How to love

2008-03-29T23:20:00.000+01:00

Be honest to myself and to a partner!
Be curious!
Don't make a partner have a responsibility!

-Daniel-

A message from Germany

2008-03-26T21:13:00.002+01:00

Finally, finally I´m in Germany. Today morning, I arrived at ZEGG community.

I stayed at Copenhagen airport for three days. I had to wait until Tuesday to get the re-entry visa to Denmark because of Easter holiday. During Easter holiday Danish Imigrant service center had been closed. I got the re-entry visa, so I can stay in Germany until the end of April. I stayed at CPH airport five times so far, I have many memories. CPH airport is my favorite airport in the world. :)

For three days, I visited Huang's house, Danish national museum and Louisiana museum. Danish national museum was much nicer than I expected. I saw exhibition about Danish history from 17 centry to the 2000 year. It was well organized and it made people understand Danish history and society more. Moreover it's free. Such a huge place, I couldn't see every section. In case of Louisiana museum, I thought it would be nicer to visit in summer. The day when I visit there, it was snowy and cold, so it wasn't beautiful outside of museum. But I enjoyed 'Cézanne & Giacometti' exhibition. Louisian museum is for modern art. They showed Cezanne's influence on Giacometti and compared their works. It was very good.

And yesterday night, I stayed in Berlin train station. Because I arrived at Berlin around 11p.m. It was too late to go to the community. It was extremly cold. I won't try to stay in a train staion any more. But this community is really nice, it made me have a fresh energy. Nice people, nice building, nice food. I wouldn't say that this community is an eco village. They don't have a big land for farming(but they have a vegetable garden), their main business is workshop or renting a place for other workshops. I suppose the focus of this community is creative things such as art, meditation, singing... And I've already interviewed a nice woman, who is 50 years old. I'm looking forward to have a good time here. But now, I'm so tired....

Where am I?

2008-03-19T21:04:00.002+01:00

I'm with my Korean friend. My friend came to Denmark last February. She works in a NGO(DRH school, a kind of education& development movement). She wants to initiate a new school in Korea, therefore she is being trained to be a headmaster of a school. Anyway, I've been in her school with her for four days from Sunday.

Now, I'm very happy to see her and very comfortable. She cooked Korean soup(Doenjang soup) for me. It was great!! I haven't taste Doenjang sauce for 10 months. I feel like I'm in Korea. Today, I cooked Kimbob and Spicy chicken soup for the students of this school.

Today, she showed me a short movie. While she stayed in Korea, she filmed some friends of mine and my mom. I could see their faces and hear their voices. I was eager to meet them. My mom... looked good... My feeling is complicated... I don't know what to say.

I'll leave here on Friday. I should say good bye to my friend.
I don't like parting....

Last Friday

2008-03-19T19:53:00.004+01:00

I met a healer. When I interviewed her, she was hesitant to tell me about her job. Carefully she answered. She is a healer. She showed her hands. Her two hands were very warm. Healer? I asked her. "Did you massage?" But she didn't massage, just touched the painful spot and prayd to Jesus. Then something happened. Marvelous!! She didn't have any religion, she thought every religion was a part of God. But she was grown up in Christian society so she prayed to Jesus. I believe that she has special curable hands. Now, I know there are many thing that might be diffucult to understand according to reason. I'd like to believe it. :) She told me, "You can cure with your hands as well, but you should believe that you can do it."

On a Friday night at 11:30 p.m., I went to Svendberg with two guys. Before I visited this community, I was told that many left wing people and hippies moved to Svendberg from Copenhagen during the 1970's. So this place is more progressive. I wanted to visit this small town but I didn't have a chance. Fortunately, two guys suggested to go to the bar in Svendberg last Friday. We took a taxi and went to the bar. It was called "Machine" in Danish.

That place was very small, cozy and looked old fashioned. I loved the atmosphere. In fact, we were not allowed to enter the bar. The place was not for selling beer. It was a cultural place for the membership. Every members of this cultural club pay for the rent of this bar every month and they have a dinner together twice a week and play the music together and drink, talk together. This place was like an underground. They are making some cultural projects such as concert and theater in Svendberg. They are not professional musucian, they play just for fun.

I met a musician there. He worked in the hospital for two days and he played the music for three days with his band. I could hear many kinds of music. Irish music, Iranian music, Yugoslavian music... I really enjoyed at the moment. I was soooo happy. We drank until 3 a.m.

And on Sunday, I left hippies' place, the southern part of Fyn.

2008-03-14T21:56:00.001+01:00

If innovation is something you want to block, the most effective thing to do is to go out and find the change agents and engage them in a conversation.

What I did last week

2008-03-10T19:02:00.004+01:00

On Monday, I played badminton with three men. In this community, people play badminton every Monday. I'm not good at every sports. I was very sorry to them. I made game boring. But , for me, it was nice time. I enjoyed playing for one hour and I felt more close to people.

On Tuesday, I interviewed the guy who wanted to live like a hippie. He is 34 years old and he doesn't like working hard only for money. He's never got a stable job. He didn't work for two years before, so government gave him a job. But the job was boring so he found another job which he liked to do. Even if he didn't work, he always worked for this community. These jobs can't convert to money in the market. But he liked community work and it was more valuable. He wanted to live slowly for love and freedom and take care of others like a hippie.

However, his life is based on good Danish social welfare system. In Denmark, while people don't work, they can get some money from government. So they can pause in their crazy life. In South Korea, they cannot survive without working.

Here is another hippie. He is 39 years old. AT night, his friend visited him. I, two hippies, one hippie's friend, four people drank beer until 3 a.m. I felt like I was in Korea.(We often drink a lot of alcohol all night) The interesting thing was the fact that the hippie's friend was a press adviser for liberal Danish government. Another hippie met his friend in a journalist school 15 years ago. The journalist talked very well. From 2002, liberal party seized power in Denmark. He supported liberalism. He told us that it was good way to give people more freedom, opportunity. If there were some failures in this system, society security system will take care of them, so no problem! It seemed to make a sense. But if there isn't any social security system such as Korea, many Asian countries, also many other countries... In Denmark, there is consensus about social welfare system. Even if this government choose liberal way, they should keep strong social welfare.

I was told that this liberal government has cut off the budget about supporting many eco-project. As this result, Danish eco village network office had to be closed. But this government like to talk about environmental problem and majority people who chose this government also like politicians to talk about environmental problem. Because it looks good!

But!!! They never like to change their life to solve this kinds of problem. Many Danish people chose this government, of course it's democracy, but I feel something wrong...

In South Korea, we had a present election last December. I hate the new president. He was a CEO of Hyndai company. He doesn't have any philosophy. The only thing he is good at is building something everywhere destroying an ecosystem(Hyndai is a big construction company not only producing cars). I'm afraid of him... But many Korean chose him. It's democracy.. but.. I can't understand...

The first interview

2008-03-01T21:05:00.003+01:00

I made the first interview in this eco-village.

The first interviewee was a teacher who was the same age as me. This community is quite young. There are four 28-year-old people and mostly around 30-year-old people among 25 people. Of course, there are some old people. She is very active and has a clear and obvious opinion about Danish society and this community. And she is a teacher. In general, teachers are mostly good at talking! :) Our relationship was good, so I could interview her comfortably. At the last moment, she told me I was strong. Yes! I'm strong... I like myself.

In the evening, I interviewed the man who initiated this community. I suppose he is 30 years old. For the last week, I had worked with him, he is very kind, calm, delicate, considerate... Anyway, he is a very nice guy... While I talked with him about eco-village, I was very happy. I could share same interest with somebody and talk about our future, get advice, even though I met the somebody in this place where was far from South Korea. I was really, really happy at the moment. I wish I met Korean who share same interest and want to establish a new eco-village.

Today, I found an interesting thing about Danish culture!
When I talked with the teacher, I asked her where her baby was. She told me. "He is sleeping outside." What? It was raining, windy and very cold outside. I was a little bit surprised. But she told me, it was normal for baby to sleep in a baby carriage outside. Except night time, babies usually sleep outside. Even they are in a daycare center... Parent should bring a baby carriage to the daycare center for sleeping-outside...For Korean, it looks like neglecting or abuse... But Dane think it's right way to bring up children. Cultural difference... I'm curious.. what about other European countries?

Den Selvforsynende Landsby

2008-02-25T21:48:00.008+01:00

The Self-Sustaining Village

This village has some pieces of land neighbouring the small village of Hundstrup. From Stenstrup to this village, there was no bus, no shop. It was started 2004. It's a very new eco-village, so I chose this community. I thought I could learn how to start a community, some problem or difficulty an so on... from this village. They are still building their houses.

My first impression about this community was 'too many children'. There are 25 grown-ups and 20 children. I realized again that I was not familiar with children.-.-
But people here are very nice and kind... They are curious about me. Svanholm and Christiania have many foreigners but for this small and new community, I'm very new and strange. I like these people and this community.

And, I got a cozy room. There is a Danish old farm house. People eat together at dinner and this house is a kind of common place. My small room is upstairs. I like it very much.

In Christiania

2008-02-22T17:35:00.002+01:00

I'd been in Christiania for 9 days. Many things happend. I met many people from outside of Christiania, alcoholics, junks, some Egyptian, an Algerian, a Spanish, some musician(a rock-and-roll musician, a Brazillian musician, a Venezuelan musician, African musicians, a Danish old musician)... Christiania was an international place.

Also, I met clown couple and artactivist couple(They had been visiting many alternative community like me and they wanted to publish their book with film). I was envious of their togetherness. It would be great to share my project and do together with somebody.

Most interesting person was a Danish teacher smoking hash. I met him in a pub. He looked like a homeless. I asked what he did. He answered he was studying to be a teacher. And it was third study. At first, he studied philosophy and drop out of it and then he studied the Middle East study. Why? "For peace!" :) And he was fed up with abstract studying like me. :) He wanted to do more practical thing. He might think he could influence on his students to make the world be better. He had a long hair and smoked hash continuously. He was interested in many languages and letters. He can speak Swedish, a little Arabic and Farsi(Of course Danish and English). What he really wanted to do was teaching Farsi poem!! He was very clever and knew many strange things. I asked why he studied those things. "Just for fun!" I envied him. I never studied for fun. For me, studying was stress and big work. From now on, I'll study for fun! He was very serious and always knitted his brows but he had a nice smile. Four days later, when I left Christiania, I met him again on the street. He was drunken with a bottle of beer(it was 3 o'clock). He was on the way to Christiania. He must have smoked hash continuously in the pub.

Christiania... Many project, Creativiy, Musician, art, love...
And I learned difference.

In Odense

2008-02-22T15:22:00.005+01:00

I'm in a musik bibliotek of Odense to use a internet and avoid rain. I came to Odense the day before yesterday and stayed in mad guy's house for two nights.

I met him in Christiania. My hostess invited him and he stayed in my hostess' house for two nights. But finally my hostess kindly asked to him to go out because of his madness. He is crazy about Krishna. But I felt he was a very kind, pure person. To go to next community, I should pass Odense, so I met him again. His house looked like a temple to worship Krishna. But I enjoyed staying at his home. I learned how to cook indian food(he was a monk for many years in India) and I met his young friend(younger than me) yesterday. He is a poet and studying philosophy. He likes Sartre and Nietzsche. When he was young, he was also crazy about Krishna but not now...

I never heard about Krishna before. But Krishna is about love. Sounds good! Love and be loved... Today, I met his mother and we talked about spiritual life.

"We can't change our world, we can change only our perception about the world." "If we feel good, it's God!"

I listened to his life story. Actually, he was grown up in Christiania. When he was young, his parent were hippie and didn't take care of him. He thought there was no room for him in the world and he became a punk and then went to India to be a monk. I think the idea about Krishna fit him. To love, to loved... He told me he wanted to be loved.... I felt pity...

Anyway, today I should stay in Odense train station. -.- I hope it won't be cold...
Tomorrow I'll go to small eco village in Stenstrup, near Svenborg.

P.S.
Vio! Please tell me about your plan.
Jan! How are you? Take care! :)

from a Brazilian musician's house

2008-02-18T00:27:00.002+01:00

"To live outside the law, you must be honest!"

Be happy!
Be honest!

Spring is coming...

2008-02-10T19:55:00.000+01:00

Finally, I met Danish sunny day. I took a walk around this community. Spring is coming...

At dinner, I had my last meal here. I said good-bye to some people. And I went to one family. They are very kind and I'm very thankful to them. I wanted to give a small gift to their daughter. When I explained the meaning of the gift, suddenly it brought tears to my eyes and shed tears in front of the family. They might have been embarrased... I'm very shameful...I'm just one of the guests to them. Tomorrow morning, I should say good-bye to my building group members... I hope I can leave with smile...

The last working day

2008-02-08T23:08:00.000+01:00

Today is my last working day. From the morning, I felt strange. I usually worked with a door. I did plastering and rubbing a door.

I took some pictures of a meeting room and the building where I worked, and building group members.. I really wanted to take a picture of people here but I was shy, I couldn't do that. I got some pictures of our building group!

We finished our work at 3pm. When I said to people good-bye, they looked a little bit embarrased, asked me "You're not going to coffee room? Coffee break." After working, I usually go to my room directly. But they suggested coffee time, I went to a meeting room.

They prepared a small party for me!!! M** brought some bottles of beer and cookies. We were sitting together and they told me "Thank you for your help!". Moreover, they gave me a gift! (some money with a postcard) Oh, my Godness! I didn't expect this situation at all. I was very thankful to them and very happy...

I'm going to leave here, indeed.... But I have a weekends... I'll cook Korean food tomorrow for dinner and I'll clean a meeting room on Sunday. I've gotten a lot of things from this community. Accomodation, food, landscape, kindness... I learned a lot from people's lives and experiences though interview. But! I haven't given this community many things. In fact, I wasn't helpful so much for work. After finishing plastering walls, there were not so many jobs for me. I didn't have much power so I couldn't paint walls and I couldn't rub walls with machines.

I met many people and took leave of them for traveling. But I can't still adapt this time to say good bye... I'm a little bit sad...

2008-02-07T20:07:00.000+01:00

"Like a leaf in the river..."
"Everything happens for a reason..."

I´m likely to be a fatalist...

Danish Festival(February 3, 2008)

2008-02-07T19:26:00.000+01:00

This festival is very traditional and it's for children and their parents. They dressed up with abnormal and scare clothes and walked around this community singing a song.

And then made a queue in front of barrels. And they beat a barrel. People call it "beating cats". I was told that people really put cats in a barrel long time ago. The purpose of this festival is to send darkness, winter away and greet spring. Cat means darkness. It's a very unique Danish festival. I understand because I experienced danish darkness many times. Around 4 pm, it's already dark.

But, thesedays, it's getting light. And I found some flowers on the tree. Spring is coming?

2008-02-04T20:37:00.000+01:00

I feel it's time to leave here.
I like this community so much. just feel...

I'm lazy so I'm a slow traveler. But whenever I traveled somewhere, I could feel the time to leave.
I think one month is enough and I'm getting lost my interest in interview people in this community.
I interviewed 11 people and I made an appointment with three people this week.

Interview was started just for my personal interest but it's a very good chance to meet people and talk with them. For interview, I could visit their houses and could see their lives more.

I should be more diligent and move faster...even though I have a lot of time....

To Christiania

2008-02-01T23:10:00.000+01:00

I met one German guy here(Here are many German). He lived in Christiania for 11 years and moved to Svanholm one year ago. I told him about my engagement with the man who I interviewed on Wendsday. Surprise! The man was his neighbor! I contacted the interviewee through his homepage. This is a small world indeed.

And he told me he could introduce his friends who live in Christiania. He gave me his friends' e-mail addresses. I sent them e-mail. From one of them, I received an answer today. I just wanted to interview but she replied I could stay at her house for some days and she could look around Christiania with me and also could introduce her friend. Prima!

I can stay in Christiania! I'll go to Christiania on 11th February. I'm very excited...

Unexpected things

2008-01-31T22:59:00.000+01:00

#1
When I was in Holland, I had to move from Wormerveer to Amsterdam to find my fortune.
In the train station, I thought there was a ticket office. But there were only some automatic machines. I was embarrassed because I didn't have enough coins. Fortunately one man helped me and gave a ticket to Amsterdam. We talked and I gave him my e-mail address. The day before yesterday, I received his e-mail. I was happy.

#2
Yesterday, I went to Copenhagen to interview the man who has lived in Christiania for 30 years. My special ability is losing my way. I walked a long way in the wrong direction. In front of Vesterport station, I stopped and checked my map. One old man approached to me and explained how to get to Christiania. I was surprised. I didn't ask to him but he spoke to me first and helped. He also gave me his address. I was very thankful to him. Today, I sent him e-mail. Before I wrote a letter, I couldn't read his handwriting. So I wanted check his name at Google. I could find his name and his e-mail address easily. He is an architect!

#3
While the man explained the way to me, somebody touched me. When I turned back, I was surprised. There was a Chinese friend who I met in IPC. She is a fantastic Chinese traditional dancer(I love her dance!) and I really wanted to meet her. I was joyful. But she didn't have time because she had to go to Danish academy. I got her phone number...

#4
After interview, I lost my way again. Anyway, I walked and walked.. Finally, I found shoping road(?) and I saw a Fillipino who I met in IPC as well. Denmark is too small? Maybe, Copenhagen is too small. I heard from him about IPC friends...

Theseday I don't feel good. Nevertheless, I was very happy to meet these unexpected happenings.

My favorite ladder

2008-01-29T22:22:00.000+01:00

I painted the door of a bathroom today.

Plastering

2008-01-29T22:14:00.000+01:00

The marks of my plastering

For plastering, I need them.

My working place

2008-01-29T22:11:00.001+01:00

2008-01-27T21:40:00.000+01:00

1.
Human is group animal?
I'm so individualistic but at the same time I'm afraid of being lonely...

2.
Thesedays I visit my ex-boyfriend's blog everyday! Why!
Not only his blog but also many Korean friend's hompages for a long time.
What am I doing now? Be here!!

3.
My body has been swollen...-.- After I started traveling, I've gained 6~7kg.
I don't like buffet. I can't control the amount of food in front of many kinds of delicious food.
Stupid greedy Doo...

4.
Living together, sharing together.
I'm thinking about what it is like living together.
I can see here it's possible... But in crazy South Korea, I don't know...

My bike

2008-01-25T19:54:00.000+01:00

Today, I got my bike. The seat is not high so I can ride a bicycle easily.
And there are three steps to control speed. Cool!!
I'll call it "Badooki". "Badook" is very traditional(?) dog's name in Korea.
I don't need to walk for a long time any more...

The main building of Svanholm

2008-01-25T19:48:00.000+01:00

It was a castle and built over 200 years ago.
I'm staying in the basement of this building.

økologisk beer

2008-01-25T19:46:00.000+01:00

Today is Friday.
After working, I drank a bottle of beer with people.

2008-01-24T20:06:00.000+01:00

My main job in a building group was plastering. I plastered whole walls of this house.
And then thesedays I'm rubbing whole walls with sand paper. There are two sand paper machines. But those are too heavy to use. I couldn't hold those machine for over three miniutes. Therefore I should do my task with my hands.

Anyway, I got different jobs today.
At first, I painted the wall of a bathroom. I learned how to paint today. It was harder than I expected. It needed more power.

And then, I scrubbed some stuff off the door of a bathroom with sand paper and plastered the door. It was the easiest job today.

After lunch, I carried something like wool from outside. We are working second floor. I was going up and down upstairs about 54 times!! I was tired to death.

These jobs were very basic and simple but somebody had to do. Mostly basic things are necessary, so important like washing dishes, cleaning... Frankly, before I came here, I worried. ´In a building group? What can I do? I don't have any experience, I might be useless...' Now, they need hands. I'm willing to do these job!

I'm the only woman in a building group. I meet many men all day. At the first time, some of them looked blunt. They don't talk much but I feel their care, consideration. I met an artist, who was from Holland. He works in a building group for two days, teaches people how to draw for two days and he paints by himself for one day. He is absolutly blunt. But after talking with me, he always send me a smile(not talking!). He invited me to his atelier and showed his paintings. His color was very strong. I reminded Fauvism. His portrait looked like Van Gogh's.(Because he was from Holland?)

After working, J** told me he would make a bike for me tomorrow. He is a specialist making a bike.
I was very happy and heartwarming... To make a relationship, we need time... I've been here for almost four weeks. I feel friendly toward people.

A pumpkin soup & Dancing

2008-01-23T23:12:00.000+01:00

It's raining again... I really don't like the weather of Denmark.
Today, I had a slight cold. So I cooked a pumpkin soup for dinner after work. It's my favorite dish.
In Korea, I'd never cooked this soup. Normally I used to wheedle mom to cook. While I cooked, I was thinking of my mom...

It was not so difficult to cook. I showed my creativity a litte bit and added some small bean and raisins to the original recipe. Not so bad...

In the kitchen, I turned on the radio. Abnormally, I danced alone listening to music. I felt good.

My roommate

2008-01-21T22:04:00.000+01:00

I wonder if s/he eats somthing and can sleep....

The interesting picture in the toilet

2008-01-21T21:39:00.000+01:00

I like it!

My simple room

2008-01-21T21:36:00.000+01:00

The special Danish traditional dish

2008-01-18T21:39:00.000+01:00

Boil some Danish black bread with beer & sugar.

When you eat, put cream on top of this dish.

I like it!

Invitation for dinner

2008-01-17T00:16:00.000+01:00

I was invited to Dane house for dinner. One of building group members, the person who I interveiwed last week, he invited me. In this community, people usually have dinner together except Wendsday.

Today is Wendsday. So we cooked together in his house. I cooked potato jeon. It was the first time to cook this food. But not so bad...:)

I drank two glasses of wine and eat icecream and a lot of food... It was very nice to feel at home. He is very kind. I like him very much. His two sons are also kind. From the begining he took care of me. He told me his two nieces were adopted from South Korea 11 years ago. That's why....Today, he also told me my some expression of face made him remind nieces' expression...

After dinner, I interviewd him again for two hours with different questions from the first interview. And I recorded it!! But he was totally exhausted! Work, cook, interview... I was very sorry...

Nevertheless...
I had a Great evening and night! I'm happy!!!

I met Finnish community activists!

2008-01-14T18:28:00.000+01:00

I'd never expected to meet Finnish.

Last December, a Japanese friend traveled Finland. He let me know how to say "Hi!" in Finnish. "Moimoi!" I didn't expect to use this word soon.

Three Finnish visited Svanholm. A young woman in her twenties, a old man in his sixties and a handsome man in his forties. When I saw them, I used "Moimoi!". They liked it. :) They live in a small eco-village. They grow their own food but it's very difficult job. They had a plan to visit many eco-villages in south Europe, especially very small communities. They had special skills, one of them was a carpenter and they knew how to build a house. They wanted to help other small eco-villages sharing their skills. It was great!!
On the other hand, I don't have any skill and know-how to share... -.- I like to have a practical skill like a carpenter, a hairdresser, a good cook....

One of them, the handsome guy, introduced himself as a community activist. Das klingt interessant!! He worked to make the network of many communities in Finland.
A community activist... Sounds good!

we shared some information about other communities and they showed me a film about a Italian eco-village. Then they inform me of their community address and Finnish communities` network.
I was very happy because I could meet people who had same interest. It was exactly what I wanted .

If I have a chance to go to Finland, I'd like to visit their community.

Stupid!!

2008-01-13T21:42:00.000+01:00

I had a second interview with M** last Friday night.
Svanholm was founded in 1978 and he came here in 1979. So he know many things about this community from the beginning. Moreover, he is a very kind person and I'm on intimate terms with him.

At the first time, I started recording the interview with my MP3. At first, I didn't want to miss his story because my English was not enough to understand his telling. But, not only for my understanding, it would be precious data.

After finishing the interview, I was satisfied with. He told about this community honestely.
And I had the first data!!!

However!!!
When I checked the file, there was no file. I didn't save the file!
It was the first time to use a voice recorder with my MP3. I felt sore! I lost the precious data!

On Saturday, I went to Copenhagen to buy a new camera and a new voice recorder.
I bought the cheapest camera which was made in South Korea(actuallly made in China, I guess...:)) but it was not cheap(899DKK). I was eager for a video camera. I really want to film many communities where I'll visit. Yet I don't have much money. Of course, I can buy a video camera now but I should save money to travle for one year more. I gave up a video camera in agony.

Voice recorders were very expensive. Over 1000DKK....I want to buy good one. I'm planing to collect many stories of people living in different communities. I'm still looking for a good voice recorder.

Anyway, when I returned to my place, I took a wrong bus and it was already dark. I walked and walked more than one hour in the dark. But I had a same experience! There were some lights and cars unlike the Hoge Veluwe in Holland. There were a lot of wind, a little bit rain, and strange sound which many big trees made by wind. I was exhausted and I slept all day on Sunday.

However..
I could learn how to enjoy walking in the dark. I couldn't experience this kind of darkness in South Korea. I was grown up in big city. Everywhere, everytime is light and noisy.
So it could be a special experience...

Listen to your heart!

2008-01-08T21:21:00.000+01:00

I met one German guy here.
He's stayed here for eight months and he's been traveling for seven years.

He invited me to his great rolling house(it was fantastic! I really like it!) and served delicious food last Sunday afternoon. I told him that I wanted to learn something here. He told me I couldn't learn about life from this community. I wondered. Why?
And I visited him again in the evening to talk with him.

He asked me, "What do you want to do?"
"Ammm...(Actually I don't have what I really want to do. It's a big problem...) I want to do social activity."
He told me. "No,No,No.... It's wrong. It should be from you, not from outside!. What do you want FOR YOU!!"
Our talking started like that.

He was a workaholic. He worked 16~20 hours a day.
At that time, he put his feeling aside. As the result, suddenly his every feeling came to him and made him be confused when he was 35 years old. And he tried to kill himself three times.

Then he tried to live again. He started new life with one question. "What do I need?" In fact, he didn't need many things. Instead of his house, he bought a big and old car and started making his new house. And from that time, he started traveling and did only what he wanted to do.

He suggested me...

Be an egoist!

Don't think and follow your heart!
I was surprised. It was the exact same thing as my Japanese stupid friend had told me before!

Don't work! Live for fun!
He told me, if I do something I really like, money, people will come to me.

"What should you do? Don't think! It comes up from your heart. Listen to your heart!"

Go with my gut!

Tomorrow morning, he will leave here to travel Asia(He likes Asia).
Can we meet again? I hope we can meet again somewhere in Asia.

Memory

2008-01-08T18:51:00.000+01:00

On 29th December 2007 in Denmark

I don't know anything...

2008-01-06T16:16:00.000+01:00

After IPC, I was very excited to visit some communities.
Whenever I met some people after I came to Svanholm,
I told them that I would join and establish a kind of community.
Really I want to live in a sort of community, it doesn't matter the size, with some people who can share same ideas with me.

But!!!
I don't know what the better life is, how I should live,
I just wanted to see and experience different ways of lives.
However I don't know what I should learn and experience.

I'm very naive.
I shouldn't have told people like that.
I can say that I want to see your life style. It was enough.
I don't have any idea about my community.
I don't know about agriculture, building.
I don't have any obvious philosophy. Even money...
How can I found a community or a school?

I should be more careful.
"I just want to experience your daily life..." It's enough...

Snow

2008-01-05T21:56:00.000+01:00

It was snow in this small community this evening.

The road was covered with snow and I left my footprints.

I was full of fresh feeling.

The loooong day

2008-01-04T22:53:00.000+01:00

I had such a long day.

I started my work at 8 a.m.

We had a short coffee time at 9:45 a.m.

And then worked again until 12.

For half an hour, we had a lunch time and then worked again.

Today is Friday. So work was finished early at 3 p.m.

Every Friday, people in building group drink a bottle of beer.

So, I drank organic beer today!!! (But, the taste of beer is always same for me.)

And from 3:30 p.m., I helped to cook for the dinner until 6:15 p.m.

After that I was exhausted. But for cooking, I really enjoyed those jobs.

I drank two glasses of wine, actually I'd already been drunken before dinner.

I ate delicious dishes.

And then, I interviewed Txx until 8 p.m.

It was my first interview here. I don't know it was successful or not.

Tomorrow I'll check again.

For three days, I used my body much more than before.

I had pain in my right hand. I couldn't control the power of hand.

I'm trying to use left hand. My neck, waist as well...

I should take a rest this weekends.

But, I like this daily life still now.

"Selvforvaltning"

2008-01-03T21:18:00.000+01:00

We wanted a direct influence on decisions that concerned our own lives.

We wanted to do as we pleased and do some of those things that simply can't be done 'because "It's absolutely unrealistic" and "besides, there's no money in it".'

-From Svanholm homepage-